We hear so much about Narcissism today. Due to the lack of understanding of what a true narcissist is, the label is used recklessly. In truth, it is believed that only 1% of the population is truly narcissistic. In reality, this fact makes it more difficult for those suffering under the abuse of true narcissism, in that their pleas for help aren’t taken seriously. Their abusers are given excuses by those who don’t recognize the facts, and the real damage done is minimized in the minds of most.

There are at least 9 strange behaviors of a true narcissist - when you are living with them and this is a part of life, you struggle to understand why they do it. A deep dive into narcissism becomes a shock: realizing just how much this was a part of your life!

1. Not answering simple questions: Example: "Where are we going?" Answer: either complete silence or "Don't worry about it - you don't need to know, I've got it covered!"

2. Ruining special occasions: Example: A birthday dinner is planned, and he decides on the day of that it isn't necessary. OR while you are cleaning and preparing for a special holiday, he will undo the work while you are doing it and stand around and mock your efforts.

3. Creating conflict: This is just a way of life. Bringing up sensitive topics or asking negative questions in front of people to create division and conflict. Pointing out that someone is down or not in a great mood and poking fun instead of trying to uplift. When a plan is made, he decides he has a better plan and does his own thing instead of going along with everyone else.

4. Mocking with noises: Example: If you are crying while trying to explain your emotions, he will mock your cry... If you laugh, he will mock your laugh. He even mocks your voice when you speak.

5. Always have to be right: Not only that, but they always know how you should do or should have done something - even if they've never done it.

6. Walking ahead: I don't think I've ever gone anywhere with mine that he didn't walk way ahead -leaving me behind - even
   when injured or after surgery. There is no concept of together

7. Rewriting history: This is an obvious effort to blame others
   for his mistakes or put himself in a better light. Remember,
   he is never wrong.

8. Impressing strangers: Example: Watch the voice and
   demeanor changes when the waiter approaches the table.
   Listen to him carry on with people on the phone as if they are
   best friends while he cannot speak one decent sentence to
   you. Watch the great lengths he will go to to impress
   strangers and others outside of family. Not only that - but
   watch his concern if anyone he thinks belongs to him or
   represents him doesn't "look" or "present" as he thinks they
   should!

9. VICTIM. While he lives his life victimizing, he can very
   quickly and easily make it appear he is the victim of others.

HOPE

It is easy to fall into hopelessness, discouragement, and even depression when living day after day with narcissistic abuse. The victims of this abuse are among the loneliest of all, because most of the wounds are below the surface. Much of the verbal abuse is done covertly; part of the “win” for the abuser is the game he is playing with the minds of those around him. But as long as we have breath, there is hope.